# Bethak - The Desi Lounge > Love & Relationships >  Emotional Cheating

## friendlygal786

Hello friends  :Smile: 

Wanted to know wat u think about emotional cheating...is there such a thing? What is emotional cheating and wat r ur thoughts on it. 
If anyone doesnt kno wat it means, let me kno, I'll be happy to explain it

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## niceguy

if ur refering to emotional blackmail, u women know plenty about it. it's a sad strategy to get ur way all the time.

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## friendlygal786

NO, im talking bout emotional CHEATING...do u kno wat that is

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## niceguy

arrg u should explained it

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## friendlygal786

ok, well emotional cheating is wen u cheat on ur bf/gf by talking/sharing ur feelings, probs, wit another guy/girl...its just like physical cheating only it doesnt involve physical contact

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## niceguy

i wouldn't classify that as cheating. ur friends are the ones to go to when ur stressed out or have problems. I open up to my friends more then i do to my family.

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## Tulip

Can you explain it furthur Yasra? 
I am getting your point that you feel cheated (or hurt) when you come to know that someone so close to you is sharing stuff with someone _else_ and not you. But does that mean he/she is not supposed to be friends with anyone else other than you??

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## friendlygal786

Sure Tulip...here is an article explaining it further


Is having a friend of the opposite sex (or the same sex, as the case may be) a sign of emotional infidelity? Here's how psychologists see signs of emotional cheating.

Emotional cheating can be difficult to wrap your mind around. Its not like a real affair (with intercourse) or a sort-of-but-not-really affair (everything but the intercourse). Emotional infidelity doesn't necessarily break spoken vows, create unwanted pregnancies, or spread sexually transmitted diseases. Emotional cheating can't always be spotted in the traditional ways.

Emotional infidelity can be as devastating to a marriage or partnership as sexual unfaithfulness - if not more so. Determining the difference between harmless flirting versus cheating is important to a healthy relationship.

*How emotional cheating starts*

Most people dont plan to be emotionally unfaithful. Emotional cheating starts by casually chatting with coworkers or people they see regularly  and it grows into more than friends. They go for lunches, take business trips, or make special efforts to see the person to whom theyre getting attached. They think about their friend more and more, until it becomes a definite emotional bond. Those are signs of emotional cheating.

Internet relationships are more and more popular since everyones wired up. Emotional cheating now begins in chat rooms, forums, or discussion groups. They evolve into private conversations and emotional infidelity.

[I]*Signs of Emotional Cheating*[/I]

Emotional cheating happens when you:

    * Discuss your partner and relationships with your friend. You share your fears, hopes, and dreams (this is emotional intimacy).
    * Meet your friend for dinner or lunch without telling your partner.
    * Keep your computer, files, and internet sites password-protected.
    * Hide or are secretive about your life, relationships, and activities.
    * Keep your partner waiting while you spend time with your friend.
    * Stay in regular, intimate contact with ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends. Emotional cheating can spring from close relationships with past lovers.

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## Muzi

Emotional cheating happens when you:

* Discuss your partner and relationships with your friend. You share your fears, hopes, and dreams (this is emotional intimacy).
* Meet your friend for dinner or lunch without telling your partner.
* Keep your computer, files, and internet sites password-protected.
* Hide or are secretive about your life, relationships, and activities.
* Keep your partner waiting while you spend time with your friend.
* Stay in regular, intimate contact with ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends. Emotional cheating can spring from close relationships with past lovers.



Its pretty much what you just said there :Smile:

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## dsjeya

man and woman are not meant to be 100% faithful
but to be able to overcome temptations ,crush and flirtation and live with real affection with ones partner,if can achieved it is remarkable
after the marriage once the initial euphoria wanes
husband is a bore
wife is sexually not exciting

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## Tulip

_Emotional cheating happens when you:

* Discuss your partner and relationships with your friend. You share your fears, hopes, and dreams (this is emotional intimacy).
* Meet your friend for dinner or lunch without telling your partner.
* Keep your computer, files, and internet sites password-protected.
* Hide or are secretive about your life, relationships, and activities.
* Keep your partner waiting while you spend time with your friend.
* Stay in regular, intimate contact with ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends. Emotional cheating can spring from close relationships with past lovers.
_

It's sad that this thing is quite common now, people do that without even realizing that they are doing something wrong.

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## friendlygal786

yea Tulip...it is happening alot and its a serious thing, it IS actual cheating

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## Endurer

> * Meet your friend for dinner or lunch without telling your partner.


Eh! How is this cheating? I have a friend, I like spending time with him/her so why, at the first place, do I need to inform my spouse? I don't think we're babysitting each other.




> * Discuss your partner and relationships with your friend. You share your fears, hopes, and dreams (this is emotional intimacy).


I don't discuss or share anyone's fears but I do share what we have in common. Sometimes I need to vent off or just get something out of my mind.




> * Keep your computer, files, and internet sites password-protected.
> * Hide or are secretive about your life, relationships, and activities.


Cheating? Whatever happened to privacy?




> * Stay in regular, intimate contact with ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends. Emotional cheating can spring from close relationships with past lovers.


That's cheating.




> * Keep your partner waiting while you spend time with your friend.


Grow up, please.

Now present whoever wrote this whine of an article up there in Yassi's post.

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## friendlygal786

so wat exactly r ur views bout emotional cheating Bhai...do share

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## *--Half_Dead--*

oh yes emotional cheating sounds so kool
wanna try that!!

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## Endurer

I don't think there's anything as such as _emotional_ cheating.

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## friendlygal786

hmm...ok, I have experienced it so I hav to say there is such a thing

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## Endurer

How were you cheated emotionally?

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## friendlygal786

well, wat do u call it wen ur partner talks for hours to a friend of the opposite sex (day and night) and hides it from u...for 2 years...and when u find out he fights with u for his friend, defends her and even tho it hurts u, wont stop talking to her??

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## RAHEN

breaking of trust...leads to emotional instability...and in other words i think that will be called cheating...

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## Endurer

> well, wat do u call it wen ur partner talks for hours to a friend of the opposite sex (day and night) and hides it from u...for 2 years...and when u find out he fights with u for his friend, defends her and even tho it hurts u, wont stop talking to her??


I am not advocating for him but don't you think we have a life out of a relationship too? I don't condone the hiding part but a friends a friend be it a male or a female so sup with gender?

PS: I don't see how is this considered emotional cheating or cheating at all unless you both were under some kind of tell-all-no-female-friends oath.

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## friendlygal786

well, its a bit mor complicated than that brother, and I dont wish 2 share all the tiny details here but lets just say i hav experienced it

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## Endurer

Whatever it is Yassi, I hope you get over it soon.

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## niceguy

> well, wat do u call it wen ur partner talks for hours to a friend of the opposite sex (day and night) and hides it from u...for 2 years...and when u find out he fights with u for his friend, defends her and even tho it hurts u, wont stop talking to her??


u should move on

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