# Bethak - The Desi Lounge > Freedom Castle >  A Question For Girls And Guys

## *Fatima*

I want serious replies only please....dont make it personal nor religious.... just general opinion.


after ur marriage will u allow ur wife to keep contact with her male friends like classmates, cousins who stayed close with her or online contacts even? if any of them call for her to ask how she is doing etc or even just come to visit or she invite herself someone for dinner etc with ur presence ofcourse so will u allow it? or will u mind? some old friend meet her on the raod while shopping etc will u give him bad looks and start thinking who is he etc? or u will keep positive impression abt it?

on extreme cases if she loved someone before you but couldnt marry him say any reason and he just saw her while u r out with her and come to say hi hello wt will be ur reaction?


same question for girls with ofcourse hubby instead of wife lol and ur hubby's female friends...

also what type of life partner u would like to live with one who wont mind such things? or one who is curious who came to see you etc.....

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## Omar

I think no one is going to reply

So remove that line k u neeed serious replies

then u can get replies here

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## niceguy

i personally wouldn't keep anyone away from their friends. After all, it's them who were there for her through good times and there to share her bad times. I couln't possibly take that away from someone. Although i would like to know who her friends are and their history. About her meeting her old love, i wouldn't be comfortable at all. I wouldn't blatently say "no you cant c him" , i'd just tell her not to get too close to him or get too personal.

The partner i would like to live with should be very open minded, she wouldnt mind me meeting up with my old friends, but at the same time should be aware on who im meeting and my relations with that friend.

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## Ash

indeed,  its a very intresting topic fatima :up;

nice guy i like ur reply.. 

 i'll add my reply soon inshAllah.

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## *Fatima*

thanx huni

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## Pwincess

hmm my husband can have his female friends if I can have my male friends
but i wud like to know his friends..what kind of people they are

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## dsjeya

times have changed and woman meet males while studying and working,a  kind of relationship with some develops friendship/love
yet when u r married what happens to the relationship.subcontinent males r dangerously
possesive and suspicious
so sacrifice your frienship 4 succesful marriagelife

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## NaUmAn MaSoOd

well in my opinion husband and wife should be like an open book to each other..
well as u asked tht should any husband mind if his wife keep contact with her male friends..well i guess he shouldnt mind as long as its just a friendship..ager husband wife ek doosray se sacha pyaar kertay hai to they should trust each other aur kisi aur friends se baat kerna koi burii baat nahi hai...
 secondly one should kno how his/her life partner feels ..like if a husband dun feel compfortable if u talk to your male firends then just dont..like u have to live your life with your husband not with your male friends so isiliye to keep a healthy relationship with ur husband u should go according to his likes n dislikes..
  waisay bhi if sumtimes ur husband doesnt allow u to talk to  a male friend to woh bhi kabhi kabhi aap keh liye acha hi hota hai,,like aisa nahi sochna chahye keh he is being possesive...u can think tht he loves u more then anyhting in this whole world and he cares abt u alot isi liye woh kabhi aisa kerta hai..
well yeh to  mera opinion thaa ..maybe ghalat ho ..so jo laga maine keh dia...

for ash: oye ash ager tumnay shadi keh baad baat kerna chori na mujhse i mean online ya phir real life mein to maine tumko nahi chorna hai :P hahaha

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## Ash

> for ash: oye ash ager tumnay shadi keh baad baat kerna chori na mujhse i mean online ya phir real life mein to maine tumko nahi chorna hai :P hahaha


tum bhi na pagal ho aik dum  :Smile: , tum meray dost ho aur hameesha rahoo gey, main dostoo ko beech rastay main choor kar janay waloo main se nai hon :P well pehli koi kaam ki post deekhi hai tumhari, mera friend tu kafi samjhdar lagta hai  :ye; hmm.. nice answer, main bhi shayed aisa hi jawab deti.. aur nomi jaisa ke tum ne kaha ke hubby ko apni wife ke male friends per agar koi objection ho tu nai milna chaye rite.. tu same  goes 4 guyz, jab tak dono partner aik dosray ke friends ke saath compfortable feel kartay hain tab tak dosti raknhi chaye per aik had tak, per i'd just tell him not to get too close to her or get too personal. baki zindagi tu do logoo ne guzarni hai, tu kisi b third person ki waja se khud ka apna relation kiyoon kharab karien ?

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## NaUmAn MaSoOd

lo ash mein waisay bhi samajhdar hoon..bus sab ko samajhdari aisay nahi dekhata..anyways what u said is also true but similar to mine

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## dsjeya

husband +female friends =o.k
wife +male friends = divorce
as thing stands today

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## Ash

> husband +female friends =o.k
> wife +male friends = divorce
> as thing stands today


so true  :Big Grin:

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## dsjeya

thank u ash
is it a healthy trend ?

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## naser7

i wud beat her up!

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## dsjeya

naser 7 frienship will go underground and to dangerous levels

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## Be happy Keep smiling

I WILL LET MY HUSBAND KEEP HIS FRIENDS, NO MATTER IF THEY ARE MALE OR FEMALE. oF COURSE IF THE FEMALE FRIEND IS VERY BEAUTIFUL, i WILL BE EXTRA CAREFUL.. (nOT JOKING.. SERIOUSLY!)..  :Smile:  
iF HE LOVED SOMEONE BEFORE MARRIAGE, AND THAT PERSON COMES TO SAY HI, i WONT LIKE IT ..  :Big Grin:

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## denali

every one must create trust in each other especially before marriage. If you know that you cannot control your feelings or trust your partner you will always have fear and it will be a ghost in marriage.
Everyone needs to feel free and trusted. Women's liberation is an example of this freedom and trust.
Trust yourself, trust your partner and enjoy life.
There is a saying that we will meet all our friends and loved ones in the next world, so if it is ok there it should be ok here.

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## dsjeya

possesiveness is the villain
even conservative socities tolerate male -female
frienship
but not the otherway
i am working with lot of girls if we control our nerves no problem

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## CreamPuff

My boyfriend wouldn't mind if I stay in touch with my old male friends... but to be honest, I'm the jealous type. I don't mind him talking to his female pals... as long as I know who they are :P

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## dsjeya

some of friends allow their wife into the kichen too
personaly after 60 my wife can talk to her male friends

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## Ash

how mean dsjeya!

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## S@nia

*Simi,
Do not use all CAPS in your messages. It rude and considered the internet equivalent of shouting.*

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## dsjeya

o.k ash i will allow her after 90 if alive

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